BDSM Basics

Whether you call it BDSM, kink, or power play, what we're talking about is a consensual exchange of power that gets all parties involved turned on.

BDSM: breaking it down

The letters BDSM stand for bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism, and masochism. Your own brand of kinky play might involve any or all of the above! One myth about BDSM (and there are lots to choose from) is that kink means getting off on pain. That certainly can be the case, but power play can also be pain-free, or even hands-free! So, if you don't consider yourself to be masochistic or sadistic, don't worry – you can play, too.

Tops, bottoms and more

Some people who enjoy kink identify as a top (someone who gets pleasure from dominating others), a  bottom (someone who likes to be submissive), or a switch (a person who is sometimes dominant, and sometimes submissive). However, not everyone relates to these labels, and many of these terms can mean different things to different people. Being kinky is an integral part of some people's sexual identity. For others, BDSM play is something fun to bring into sex once in a while. And there are those who enjoy a regular BDSM practice, but don't experience it as particularly sexual.

Your kink is not my kink but that's okay

There's a ton of diversity in people's kinky desires and practices. The phrase “your kink is not my kink but that's okay” (sometimes abbreviated to YKINMKBTOK or simply YKIOK) both acknowledges this diversity and asserts a sex-positive acceptance of difference and rejection of shaming. As with all forms of sexual or bodily interaction, the key is that everyone involved consents – enthusiastically! – to what is happening. Beyond that, there is no right or wrong way to be kinky.

Your kinky play might take the form of handcuffs and hot wax, while your friend particularly enjoys a floggergag ball and some nipple clamps. Your neighbors downstairs? They prefer a blindfold and a feather. It can be as simple as a hand that spanks and pinches, or a costume and some stern words. One of the great things about BDSM is that imagination is often all you need to get off (although toys and props might add to the fun!).

Any which way you like your kink, Other Nature will help equip you for the job.

We've got gear including rope, floggers, blindfolds and nipple clamps, great advice guides, BDSM erotica and kinky porn, and regular how-to workshops.

If you’re a novice, don’t be shy – the staff at Other Nature are happy to answer your questions as best we can, and help you on your kinky way!